One does not simply walk into David Orr’s Office …

… actually, one does, and one will tomorrow. So shut it, Boromir.

I’ve read enough and assumed too much about obtaining the documents I need for this project. I’m taking the bull-in-a-china-shop approach, and I’m going right into the Cook County Vital Records Office and asking myriad questions. I refuse to listen to elevator music for hours on a telephone waiting line, and I’d rather the employees in David Orr’s office see the face they will come to fear and possibly loathe for the next few weeks, if not months.

I’ve already filled out one request form for my great-great-grandma’s marriage and death certificates. Those two documents themselves will cost more than $30 … and that’s barely a dent in everything I need.

I edited Grandma Eischen’s information because she prefers that no one knows her age. Her elusiveness in matters of age have prevailed to this very day, except for her close family who does not wish to divulge her secret. I don’t think her best friends even know her actual age. Now that she has an account on Facebook, she can easily access the blogs I post on my Wall, so I won’t blow her cover.

But seriously. If I’m counting correctly, I still need 13 more certificates (marriages only count as one, Grandma and my parents are alive and the generous residents of Enscherange, Luxembourg, have sent my great-great-grandma’s certificate free of charge). I also don’t necessarily need Peter’s birth certificate as long as I have Susanna’s, but I might be able to unearth it in Mertzig now that Sarah found Susanna’s birth certificate rather easily in Enscherange.

I also forgot about myself in this sprawling Luxembourgish family tree. But obtaining a copy of my own birth certificate won’t be too difficult.

Luckily I have a bit of money saved up for the expense. In the long run, this investment will mean cheaper — if not completely free — admission to museums and other benefits as a citizen of Europe.

Even if I don’t submit requests for everyone tomorrow, I can at least familiarize myself with the process of requesting forms and how the bureaucracy works. Ideally, I want all the records in a folder by the end of September. Does this sound unrealistic? Perhaps, but it’s not as crazy as Newt Gingrich colonizing the moon.

Holy smokes, I just realized something when I inserted the above picture into this post. Guess who’s sitting in front of the sardonic April Ludgate on Parks and Rec? It’s the Model United Nations Ambassador for the Grand Duchy of Luxembourg.

The Moon and Luxembourg would make an impenetrable coalition, backed of couse with money, moon rocks, Dennis Hastert and Newt Gingrich.

We’ll see what happens tomorrow.



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